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Ask Dr. Tseday: January 17, 2009

FT from Chino Hills, CA asks: I invited my two cousins for Thanksgiving, but they didn’t come after saying they would. I found out later they went together to another family’s house for dinner. My feelings are very, very hurt and I’m mad because they didn’t come. Do I invite them again this year?

Dr. Tseday responds: An invitation simply says, “I’d love to have you here, please come and join me if you wish,” that’s all. It doesn’t guarantee anything. Your cousins have the freedom to choose where they want to spend their Thanksgiving just as you do. So, yes, invite them again this year because it’s a decent and loving thing to do. There’s no need to be vindictive. It’ll cost you at the end.

About the author

Dr. Tseday is a clinical psychologist and one of the country's leading experts in marriage, relationships, and self development. She advocates a unique and at times controversial approach to the dynamics of marriage and personal development, the necessary element for a successful relationship. Read more »

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